Category: Driving Jokes
 

      A wild drinking party in the woods was prematurely curtailed by a sudden storm - thunder, lighting and torrential rain. Two young men, much the worse for drink, were forced to run for ten minutes in the driving rain before eventually reaching the sanctuary of their car. Just then the rain began to ease off and, although neither was in a fit state to drive, they decided to head for home. So the driver started the engine and put his foot down - the sooner they got home, they though, the less chance there was of being stopped by the police.
      
      They had been driving for about a minute when an old man's face suddenly appeared at the passenger window. The young men were startled, not least because the speedometer showed they were doing about 40 mph.
      
      "What do you want?" they shouted, swigging beer as the old man tapped on the window. The driver put his foot down but when the old man kept tapping, the scared passenger wound the window down partway.
      
      "Do you have any tobacco?" asked the old man quietly.
      
      The passenger looked aghast at the driver. "He wants tobacco!"
      
      "Well, give him a cigarette, quick!" shouted the river, accelerating up to 60 m.p.h.
      
      The passenger fumbled around the packet, handed the old man a cigarette and yelled to the driver "Step on it!" before quickly winding the window up.
      
      "That was spooky!" said the passenger, taking another swig of beer.
      
      "You're not kidding!" agreed the driver. "Let's get home - fast!"
      
      But moments later, with the speedometer touching 80 m.p.h., there was another tap at the passenger window.
      
      "I don't believe it!" screamed the passenger. "It's him again!"
      
      "See what he wants now," yelled the driver.
      
      The terrified passenger wound the window down a little and the old man asked politely: "Have you got a light?"
      
      The passenger tossed a lighter out the window, wound up the window and again ordered the driver to put his foot down.
      
      They were now doing 100 m.p.h. and still guzzling beer, trying to forget what they had just seen, when all of a sudden there was more knocking.
      
      "Oh no! He's back!"
      
      The passenger, shaking with fear, wound down the window and, in a trembling voice, asked the old man what he wanted this time.
      
      The old man replied softly: "Do you want some help getting out of the mud?"