Category: Women Jokes
 

      She say: "I can't believe how skinny Liz Hurley has become.
      She means: I've put on weight."
      
      She say: "You know, a lot of men like girls with fuller figures."
      She means: "I've put on weight."
      
      She says: "You can't trust the dress sizes in shops these days."
      She means: "I've put on weight."
      
      She says: "I like to see you enjoying your food."
      She means: "Because then you'll be as fat as me."
      
      She says: "Go on, it's your birthday - enjoy yourself."
      She means: "Take me out to dinner."
      
      She says: "No pudding for me, but you carry on."
      She means: "I'll be having half of it."
      
      She says: "Thanks for washing the dishes."
      She means: "I wonder if he's having an affair?"
      
      She says: "You don't think this outfit's too young for me, do you?"
      She means: "Think very carefully before answering. Your life could depend on it."
      
      She says: "It's your decision, dear."
      She means: "Provided I agree with it."
      
      She says: "He wasn't a real boyfriend - I didn't like him that much anyway."
      She means: "He dumped me."
      
      She says: "I'm just not ready for a relationship.
      She means: "Not with you."
      
      She says: "You're more like a brother to me."
      She means: "I find you physically repellent."
      
      She says: "I haven't got any secrets from you."
      She means: "Apart from the ones you haven't found out about yet."
      
      She says: "I'll be ready in two minutes."
      She means: "Give or take an hour."